There’s a saying in Buddhism: “Suffering is discomfort multiplied by resistance.”
Discomfort is par for the course here on Earth. One of the main roles we have as human beings is to meet our ever-evolving needs: spiritual, emotional, physical, relational, and intellectual. Emotional discomfort arises throughout our lives for very good reasons. The discomfort, whether in the form of anger, resentment, hatred, confusion, exhaustion, or suicidal urge, always has a sacred message for us:
These emotions tell us that something we need is missing. If we learn how to sit with and listen to our emotions with enough presence, we can also learn from them exactly what we need to right the balance again.
TLDR: Emotions are need-meeting geniuses.
Unfortunately, in our culture, we judge, shame and neglect uncomfortable emotions in favor of a “quick fix.” We placate the baby with a funny face or give it a toy or screen to look at. We run away from our sadness and grief with substances. We distract ourselves from our fear of boredom by overworking. This dissociative tactic never works, of course, because it dishonors us as human beings, and never truly meets the need at hand.
This pattern of resisting our discomfort starts as early as infanthood; many parents are disconnected from their own emotions, therefore the uncomfortable crying or screaming of a baby can be overwhelming and confusing to our emotionally-undeveloped caregivers. We therefore get the message, through their actions and feelings, that we are bad for being sad, mad, upset. This belief further depletes our ability to express our authentic feelings when we need to.
In general, whether directed at us or done by ourselves, RESISTANCE to discomfort causes us to repress and shut down our emotional flow. This creates stagnant, unprocessed, uncomfortable feelings that get trapped in our body, creating heaviness and restlessness. This is the cause of chronic depression and anxiety.
This pattern of repression can also result in the unbalanced expression or “acting out” of uncomfortable emotions, such as anger, rage, grief, or suicidal urge. There is such a need to move our emotions that it will find its way to the surface, one way or another.
The key to moving out of Depression/Anxiety and into Freedom/Flow is to learn how to access our emotions, no matter how uncomfortable, and extract their wisdom, so that we can restore flow and move on with our lives. When we do this, we don’t act out unexpectedly at our loved ones, and we don’t hide who we really are, or how we feel. We are honest, authentic, loving, kind, and peaceful inside. We are healthy from the inside-out, and able to fulfill our purpose in the world.
Interested in how to access more emotional stability and inner peace so you can feel free & confident?
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Ethereal Ecology 